Hello World! My name is Alfonzo Tucker. If you recall the historical decision of Roe versus Wade, well, that is the year I was born. So you the reader have a better understanding of me. I’m a bit more subjective than the average man when it comes to women, most likely because I’ve never known my biological mother. So know that I have true intentions to share love, some day, with a woman that I can experience every known positive pleasure with. There is no saint prefix before my name and I’ll never claim to be one yet, I have a healthy attraction for women, I just don’t know if or when my blessing will present herself.

So here is the ordeal! Last October, I’m laughing and debating with a few friends at a co-workers birthday celebration. Every one is dressed to impress of course and I feel as if no man present can compete with my smile or taste for Italia’s finest footwear. I notice this young sista, engaged in conversation, wearing a turquoise dress that rests at her knee. She stood at a nickel plus two and held the demeanor of raw power. I allowed my attraction to lead the way and before nights end she had agreed to call me. I’ve made it a point not to ask a woman for her number, it’s too common. The difference is, if she calls you then the attraction is mutual and she believes worth pursuing.

After two months of dating she told me that her virtue was untainted and she promised herself to give that to a man that would love her. I admired her and let her know how special she truly is. Our first kiss came on December first. Her lips tasted of “Co-Co” as we shared body heat while talking in front of the fireplace at my favorite restaurant, “Skates by the Bay” in Berkeley ca. My attraction for her grew as well as my physical desire. She is a great conversationalist and has the posterior to match the type of beauty I am drawn to. We discussed her likes and dislikes associated with the physical attraction taking place between us and that is when I should have recognized red flag number one. This gorgeous virgin had never even engaged in the act of fellatio. Even more disturbing she felt as if it were gross. Now, this woman is as old as the ninth prime number or the number in which Michael Jordan retired with, which ever you recognize first.

I felt in time she would change her mind, then I became more skeptical when we would become aroused together and she would hint that cunnilingus was to her liking. Well, I’ve no issues with that form of affection yet that is only part of what I have to offer. With more conversation we discussed our past sexual encounters. I’m no stranger to promiscuity and it’s been a couple years since my last health test, covering every thing from S.T.D’s to eye examinations. So I scheduled and completed all phases of my testing. Within two weeks my results were in hand like a pass held by a kid seeking admission into his first amusement park. On her own, she stated that her health test were in support of us, as she would never ask me to engage in acts that she would not. So on one hand I’m flattered that she was testing, yet on the other hand, I’m wondering if that statement had any connection with her own sexual expression. Either way, her statements and behaviors were being more and more ambiguous.

Another month passed and our dating relationship was approaching seven months. She failed to mention obtaining her results which led me to think she was not anticipating our union. Or she was skeptical, scared, or maybe unsure. Either way, my desire for her had diminished. She felt more like a sister then a love interest. I no longer thought about her while away from her and had no physical desire to reflect upon. Her kisses brought me no passion and after a few days of thought, I felt as if I would be doing both of us an injustice by forcing myself to regain a sexual desire for her. At my home we spoke and I told her that I was no longer “vibeing” with her and felt we should stop dating. She claimed to feel different and disagreed with me. I told her that she should hold on to her virtue and give it to a man that would love and treasure her. With anger passing through her lips she questioned my sincerity and demanded to know why my feelings for her had changed.

I was honest and told her that I no longer had a sexual desire for her and that I would not have her virtue. She was offended, even raised her voice allowing anger to choose her words. I told her if we could not discuss this situation as adults then she didn’t understand that I am not her future. Weeks later an older female member of her family told me that I shouldn’t have ended our relationship that way. The older woman stated that I had a negative affect on her niece’s self-esteem and that I was wrong. I felt as if I were giving her a gift by not having her for a moment of forced selfish gratification.

What do you think?

Published in : Op-Ed, Noetic to the Third Power