For many young Black boys in previous generations who were growing up without fathers, there were Black fathers in the neighborhoods who were unafraid to tell them what they needed to be doing and standing up to them when they were acting like damned fools. They, along with teachers and coaches, could discipline children without fear of reprisal from a permissive society gone mad.

Our community father was not only in the community and in the schools, but his presence was felt in many fatherless homes.

There were community fathers represented in the politicians, activists, religious icons and average working men who stood as shining examples for all to see and embrace.

If we say that our fathers are not in the homes, then where is our community father today?

Bill Cosby is not our community father. He was once America’s favorite father and sent the “lower economic people” the message that he didn’t like them very much. Like a deadbeat absentee father, he was not present when the child was growing and struggling, yet he stepped in after the fact to criticize the grown son, while still failing to offer any real assistance to balance the criticizing.

Jesse Jackson is not our community father. A bastard of the Civil Rights Movement, Jackson has no idea what he is supposed to be, and the end result is foolishness and obsolescence.

Neither athlete nor entertainer are community fathers. Magic Johnson has recently been putting in good effort, but he is no Mohammed Ali and Russell Simmons looks silly acting like a community activist after harming and/or ignoring the community for decades.

For some silly Negroes, the White man is the community father.

The mannerisms, speech and elitist thought patterns of racist Whites govern these Negroes who may as well call George Bush, Jerry Falwell or the Pope “Daddy.” Adopting the thinking of the most racist White man who pretends not to be racist, these deluded Negroes believe they are progressive simply because they are divergent from the masses of Blacks who either recall or still feel a heavy racist boot on their asses. Black sons and daughters of the White community father see no racism and believe that those who call racism out are “whining” and employing excuses for weakness, even though the children of the White community father often move ahead on the backs of generations of “whiners.”

Because the Black community father is missing, many of us overcompensate, undercompensate, decompensate or simply fail to grow.

We can see the results of the missing community father when we see today’s younger generation enamored with an over-glamorized pimp/thug lifestyle they have never lead.

We see the results when we see women who have had only poor relationships with men, sit in circles with each other to define what a “good” man should be.

And we see those results when we see grown men avoid being too manly, afraid to toe the line because too many people will chastise a man for being a man.

Published in : Op-Ed, The Bridge