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America's Number One African American News Source
Mar 17, 2010 at 04:43 PM
Skin Folk and Kin Folk
Written by Jasmyne A. Cannick, (Columnist), on 11-13-2008 00:00
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By now, I am sure that you are aware of the fallout over the Nov. 4 election results that passed Proposition 8, an amendment to the state constitution to make marriage legal only between one man and one woman. And I have no doubt that many of you reading this op-ed were a part of the 69 percent of Blacks who supported the measure.

In the following days since then, Blacks have become the scapegoat for a poorly developed and executed campaign. From protests in Westwood that saw Blacks being accosted in their cars and called the n-word to Black gays and lesbians themselves being targeted and told that it's because of "your people that Prop. 8 passed"--much like the racist comments from members of the Democratic Party upon the realization that Senator Hillary Clinton wasn't going to get the nod-the gay community showed America how they really felt about Blacks and it didn't matter if you were gay or straight.

While I am aware of the racism that exists within the gay community, I am not blind to the homophobia that exists within the Black community.

Look--we really need to get over this issue of gay marriage. I mean really, at the end of the day how does the fact that two people want to get married affect your life? Is it taking food off your table and out of your mouth? The roof over your head? Are gays getting married the reason why Black men are being incarcerated at a rate higher than any other race? Is it the reason why more Black kids are dropping out of school and picking up guns? Is it the reason why you are unemployed and without healthcare? No, I didn't think so.

Once again, we allowed others to come into our community and dictate to us what our agenda should be. We allowed White conservatives to purchase our pulpits and then dutifully volunteered to spread their message of divide and conquer. But what's really baffling and equally troubling to me is that Black people collaborated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS) who for nearly 150 years through the Mormon Church taught that all Blacks were cursed, uncouth, uncomely, wild, and 'seemingly deprived of nearly all the blessings of the intelligence that is generally bestowed upon mankind'...among other things.

Like with the Minutemen and the issue of immigration, Black people once again made alliances with people who on any other issue we are usually standing opposite...polar opposite. Simply put-we were used.

So essentially on Nov. 4, 70 percent of the 6 percent of Blacks that make up California's population went to the voting booth and voted for Senator Barack Obama for President and Yes on Prop. 8, while in the booth next to them, their White conservative counterparts voted for Senator John McCain and Yes on Prop. 8.

The same energy we put into getting out the yes vote on Prop. 8 would have been better spent on getting Black people organized to push for better grocery stores in our neighborhoods and better schools for our children. How come we can't collectively demonstrate the same kind of organization we had for Prop. 8 when it comes to the issues we actually have control over and have a much more profound impact on our day to day lives?

If your reasons for voting yes on Prop. 8 had more to do with your moral values and religion, I want you to consider this. If you think I am going to hell for being a lesbian, then let me go to hell. God doesn't need your help and voting yes on Prop. 8 isn't going to get me there that much faster or stop me from being a lesbian.

If your child can walk past crackheads, prostitutes, and gangbangers on their way to and from school everyday, and not be pushed into taking drugs, finding a pimp, or joining a gang, then why would you think that allowing gays to get married would all of a sudden make your susceptible to being gay? Your child has a better chance of picking up your habit of smoking cigarettes or overeating and being obese and diabetic, than all of a sudden becoming gay.

What voting yes on Prop. 8 did do was allow White conservatives to divide our community at a time when we barely make up 10 percent of the electorate vote in California. It showed them that they can still pull our strings and that money talks-no matter what the issue. You might not have gotten paid for your yes on Prop. 8 vote, but believe me when I tell you millions of dollars were poured into Black communities on this issue.

It is not a good feeling for Black same-gender loving people who stand side by side with the Black community as a whole on any other issue to wake up to the fact that their friends, neighbors, co-workers and relatives voted against them, nearly 2 to 1. Especially when you add the fact that we're fighting the White gay communities racism as well.

I for one am tired of being in the middle. I am tired of working my ass off for and in a community of people who I love but who at the same time may respect my work, but not my person or my right as a person to love who I want. I don't live in West Hollywood, I live right here next door to you, and that's the case for most Black same-gender loving people. We are not only your hairdressers and choir directors. We are also your teachers, doctors, lawyers, lawmakers, activists, neighbors, and co-workers. We are your daughters, sons, brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, and cousins. We are your family. We are the tennis players on the court next to yours who have to listen to you call our brothers faggots and sissy's. We are the listeners on the other end of the radio who wake up to hear the same person who smiled in our face yesterday talk about how our lives are immoral.

Look no one is telling you want to believe in. If your religion or moral values dictates to you that marriage should be between a man and a woman, that's your business--don't make it mine. Because the same book that you use to condemn my life and justify your voting for Prop. 8 is the same book given to Black people by the Massuh that validated his mistreatment of his slaves. Keep it real. It was the Bible that White people used to tell Black people that they were to be treated as property rather than human beings.

I am not asking you to like the fact that I am a lesbian or even agree with it. What I am asking you to do is think about the fact that discriminating against lesbians and gays affects the Black community as well. It affects me and people like me. People who have been and will continue to be an essential part of the Black community. To the extent that my words have any influence at all on you, please remember that today it's my life that's up for the popular vote and tomorrow it could be yours. When tomorrow comes, where would you want this Black lesbian to stand? With my White gay counterparts or with my Black family?

Celebrated Black author Zora Neal Hurston, who was also a lesbian, once said, "Not all my skin folk is my kin folk."

I need for my skin folk to be my kin folk and so do other Black lesbian and gay brothers and sisters.

Jasmyne Cannick is a critic and commentator based in Los Angeles who writes about the worlds of pop culture, race, class, sexuality, and politics as it relates to the African-American community. Her work has been featured in the Los Angeles Times and Ebony Magazine. A regular contributor to NPR's 'News and Notes,' she was chosen as one Essence Magazine's 25 Women Shaping the World. She can be reached at www.jasmynecannick.com.

 


Last update: 11-12-2008 23:47

Published in : Op-Ed, Unapologetically Young, Black, and Female
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Users' Comments (8) RSS feed comment
Posted by LIZZIE, on 11-13-2008 18:06,
Ms. Cannick, 
 
The people of California voted, and your side lost.  
 
No need to reprimand black folk whom you feel did not support Prop 8. Whatever their reason it was their choice/decision. 
 
"We The People" Remember that!
 

Posted by Rock, on 11-16-2008 06:50,
Jazmyne, I agree with Lizzie. Plus, I read your other article where you talked about how you didin't even support the proposition. Now you want to chastise black people for not supporting it. If it was about real rights of life liberty and that kind of thing that would be one thing, but marriage? why would black people get involved in gay marriage? that's not what you guys should be standing on and putting somuch into.
 

Posted by Sam, on 11-16-2008 13:47,
My Issue is and remains exactly "moral values and religion," I did consider you ...I do not wish that yo go to Hell and will continue to pray for you. You are right, the final decision is up to God. It is still my right to believe, as it is yours not to believe. God Bless!
 

Posted by You're Confusing Me, on 11-17-2008 12:16,
Since we're being bombarded with the "Pregnant Man" story, I'd like to present a couple questions for discussion on this whole gay/alternative lifestyle situation. 
 
1 If a man has a sex change to become female, and this newly transformed female wants to marry a man, is it still a gay issue wether or not this union be legally recognized and if it is recognized, should it be considered marriage between a man and a woman? 
 
2. Many gays offer genetic arguments for being gay. If that is true, wouldn't all gays seek sex changes/reassignment? 
 
3. Why are gay people so upset with "Civil unions?" I think I agree with Jasmine that there may be a different agenda in the "white gay movement" - because gays can have the same rights with civil unions. Why the attempts to redefine marriage? 
 
I think Jasmine is as confused as I am - and maybe rightfully so. This stuff is getting wierder and wierder every day!
 

Posted by straight against 8, on 11-24-2008 17:05,
I can't believe some of the asinine comments here. I sorry to resort to name calling but this is frustrating. I'm straight. There is no way gay marriage affects my straight marriage. There is no way my voting for gay marriage is going to send me to Hell. If it's a sin to vote for it, then I'm sure i'll be forgiven like the other Christians who continually have pre marital sex, lie, steal and break all the other commandments. 
 
Worry about yourself. If you don't think gays should be married, don't marry a gay person. If gays can't fully participate in society then perhaps they shouldn't have to pay the same taxes as those who do.
 

Posted by I HAve A brain, on 11-24-2008 19:23,
This last post has to be the most ignorant grouping of words I have read in a long time. You say people should worry about themselves, but that’s the issue here. Gays want straights to worry about them by supporting gay marriage and many of us refuse to support it. It’s not about them being prevented from fully participating in society, stupid—domestic partnership benefits provide for that. It’s about changing the concept of marriage to include same sex, when it has been about two people of the opposite sex for thousands of years. It’s really not even about religion, it’s about gay people leaving straight people alone. Since I’m not gay, I don’t want to worry about it. No one is dying or being kept apart because their marriage isn’t recognized by the government.
 

Posted by Straight against 8, on 11-24-2008 20:37,
Let's forget about the issues and reduce this this to name calling. You may indeed have a brain but so does a chicken. Judging from your reponse and understanding of the issue at hand, you seem to  
have the same cognitive skills of a chicken. 
 
If someone has a domestic parter and dies, the next of kin can claim the estate of that person. Civil unions do not legally provide the same rights as married couples. 
 
Since you agree that no one dies or is hurt by them being apart, you must agree that no one died or was hurt during the brief time gay marriage was legal in California. 
 
Things change. Definitions change. Society evolves and sees that just because things may have been done a certain way for hundreds or thousands of years, doesn't mean they have to continue that way.
 

Posted by I HAve A Brain, on 11-25-2008 09:41,
Well, I don’t think you are straight, but I do know you are ignorant and angry, which is a bad combination. It’s also the reason why thinking people are opposed to many gay issues. Instead of sound reasoning, your angry rhetoric is what we get. We also know that many whites who are gay are still some racist jackasses. That, along with the wild public antics of gay people after the proposition passed has opponents cheering and people who were previously neutral turning into opponents. You think we enjoy seeing men in makeup with Daisy Dukes jumping on cars? Is that supposed to win us over? Do you think it's logical to compare this issue to Black Civil Rights? Again, stupid, many of us didn’t care, but the anger and ignorance coming at us from the likes of jackasses like you have us opposing anything you support. If you are being abused, we will care, but being denied a legal marriage is not abuse. Legislation was passed in several states providing same sex couples with domestic partnership benefits (Civil Unions) that were equal to marriage benefits. Many opponents of gay marriage supported such legislation, but were simply offended by same sex couples wanting to use the term “marriage.” So, if the argument was really for the benefits, then such legislation would be the real pursuit and the gay marriages (not legally recognized) would be done without trying to force opponents to legally accept the term for same sex couples. However, since some gay people, including yourself, want to shove their propaganda down our throats, many of us pushed back by banning gay marriage. It’s not a Black issue. You need to learn that you can’t shove anything down people’s throats and since I know I can’t reason with the unreasonable, I’ll just disconnect. You can respond, but I won’t even bother to read it. You’re stupid and there is no hope.
 

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