AT WHAT AGE IS IT TOO YOUNG TO TAKE AN OATH FOR LIFE?
(A TRUE STORY ABOUT MY WIFE)
When I met her, I was in elementary school. She was older than me, and I was claiming her as my girlfriend before I actually knew what a girlfriend was. I knew just because I was hanging with her that people thought I was "hard" and "cool".
She was born and raised in my neighborhood. Her parents let her run wild, so she was very mature and street savvy for her age. She was attractive to both young and old. When I was 13 years old, she asked me to marry her and I gladly accepted in a ceremony that made her my wife for life. I was madly in love with her and she had me growing up fast. I was doing grown-up things like getting high and drinking. We were having a lot of fun in the beginning--going to picnics, concerts, and doing a lot of dirt together. We were like "Bonnie & Clyde". She was very demanding of my time and she wanted me to be with her 24/7. She was very jealous when I tried to do anything that was not centered around her. She would always whisper sweet nothings in my ear and tell me how tuff I was. She would also tell me how I could be the baddest dude in L.A. if I stuck by her. It felt good to have a wife I could call mine.
I got three tattoos; all representing her, so everyone would know that she was my wife.
As I began to get older and mature, I noticed signs that my wife was not capable of showing me the kind of love and dedication that I had shown her. But, I made an oath and as they say, "love is blind" and I was in love, for real.
I felt as though I had the baddest wife in L.A. but due to her aggressive nature, I was always into something--"taking off on fools" or "getting jumped". I've been shot two different times and I've shot people while defending her honor. Some of my homeboys have lost their lives due to some of the madness that she had us into. However, my wife always had our backs when it came to violence.
After being married for only a couple of years, she encouraged me to shoot one of her enemies. When I did it, I was arrested and I sent to the California Youth Authority (CYA) for two and a half years.
She didn't even stay down for me. She wrote once in a while and sent money every "blue moon". She never came to visit, yet I was still running around bragging and showing everyone my pictures so that they could see how my wife was out there doing it.
I had to rely on my family to take care of me. My family tried hard to tell me, and to get me to see that my wife was a very bad influence on me; but, I was too "sprung" to see it.
As soon as I was released I kicked it with my family for a few hours. Then I was back on the block with my wife. Yeah, I ran straight back to her. She was the only woman that I ever loved. I was trying to kick it and stay out of trouble, but my wife always had something crackin'. It was not too long before I was back in the mix of things. Things were good for a while, then, one day everything went all bad. Once again, I had to let cats know that they could not mess with my wife. It was because of this that I am stuck in the pen doing life. My wife barely writes, she never comes to visit me, nor does she give me any money towards my appeal attorney. I'm in here for loving and being loyal to her, while she is out there doing her own thing. Meanwhile, I am still in here representing her, tattoos and all. I would tell anyone who asks how much I love my wife, no matter what.
Am I crazy in love, or what? We have over twenty years together and I can say that I have been loyal and dedicated through all the pain and suffering.
I went through all of this because of the vow and oath that I made to her when I was a kid. Not mature enough to understand what I was doing, I did not have any idea that things would turn out the way they did. Do you think I'm a fool?
Would you get a divorce from a one-sided situation where you are the only one always suffering just because at a young age you took an oath for life? I am sure most of you would get a divorce!
I am happy to report that I finally got the willpower to divorce my wife, after all these years of marriage, 8 years ago.
The wife that I'm speaking of in this story is none other than my gang...
All gang bangers are married to their gang. How much suffering will gang members go through due to an oath they made at such a young age?
Jeorald Pitts/Lil Tone Tone is the author of the forthcoming book, To Bang or Not To Bang--A Book of Questions. Mr. Pitts can be reached at